THE
DIVORCE CONTROVERSY
- WHEN WILL IT END?
For
years I have followed the different views among Christians on marriage, divorce
and remarriage. Various views have been expressed, with some disappearing only
to resurface under different terminology later...
The
increase of divorce in our nation also has thrust the discussion of remarriage
to the forefront, with seemingly endless views on when God allows it. It seems
that each year (or more often), we see new views on who can scripturally
divorce, how they can do so, the roles government and the church play in the
process, the, the rights of
the “innocent party” or someone divorced against his/her will, what
constitutes remarriage, , whether to preach about such views
and other issues.
What
is the cause of all this controversy? What can we do to stop the constant
barrage of new, modified and false views on divorce and remarriage that
destroys family relationships, divides churches, confuses honest Christians,
hurts friendships and labels preachers?
I
don't claim to have all the answers, but I do have a few suggestions:
Ř REMEMBER THAT THE SCRIPTURES STILL RULE -- IN SPITE
OF PHILOSOPHY, EMOTION, UNFAIRNESS, FAMILY TIES AND SUCH LIKE. Paul told the
Colossians: “See to it that no one takes you captive through philosophy and
empty deception, according to the tradition of men, according to the elementary
principles of the world, rather than according to Christ. For in Him all
the fullness of Deity dwells in bodily form, and in Him you have been made complete, and
He is the head over all rule and authority.” (Col.2: 8-10)
I don't understand why God wants unhappy,
incompatible people to stay together, but that is not for me to decide. He is
the potter, and I am the clay (Rom. 9:14-24; Isa. 29:16; Jer. 18:6). What man
may think or say on this subject simply doesn't matter. God has made the rule,
and we will be judged by how we follow it (II Cor. 5:10; Jno. 12:48).
The relationship between husband and wife was
instituted by God (Gen. 2:24). When a man and woman commit themselves to that
relationship, they are bound by God as one flesh, for life (Rom. 7:2-3). Either
party may forsake the relationship or shirk their responsibility to it (I Cor.
7:1-5), but that doesn't cause God to break the bond. "What therefore God hath
joined together, let not man put asunder"(Matt. 19:6). God considers
remarriage adultery because the bond to the original mate still exists.
Ř THE RULE OF CAUSE AND EFFECT REIGNS. For
every effect there must be a cause. We use this rule all the time when talking
with evolutionists. They like to have things "just happen," but we
know that goes against all rules of nature.
If there is a result, it must have a
cause. The earth did not just happen, God created it. Death exists because Adam
and Eve disobeyed God. Uzza died because he touched the ark of the covenantArk of the Covenant.
The same rule exists
between God and the marriage bond. For God to break the bond (effect) between a
man and his wife, there must be a cause, fornication (Matt. 5:32; 19:9). If we
did not have this one exception, given by Jesus, the marriage bond could only
be broken by death (Rom. 7:2-3).
One rule remains constant: There must be a cause before there is an effect. Scriptural divorce, or breaking the bond, must be preceded by fornication.
The question asked of Jesus was, "Is
it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?" Notice that
even those Jews recognized the rule of cause and effect; they just wanted to
have many causes for one effect. Jesus quickly pointed out their flawed
reasoning by referring them to the law God made in the beginning (Matt. 9:4-6).
Much of the controversy today is caused
by failing to accept the simple rule that scriptural divorce can only exist
if it has a scriptural cause, fornication, and that cause must always precede
effect. Some would have a divorce occur for reasons other than fornication,
then claim freedom from the bond when the other party remarries. They want
to have an effect without a cause, then later claim a cause so they can have
a desired effect. The rule simply does not work that way -- in marriage, nature,
inventions or any other forum. Jesus' rule still applies, and He gave it in
the correct order: fornication, divorce and remarriage.
Ř SPEAK WHERE THE SCRIPTURES SPEAK.
Remember that old refrain we used to follow? If I were God, then my thoughts
would mean something, and if others who expound doctrine were God, so would
theirs. But none of us are God.
The scriptures say: 1) "And I say to you,
whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another,
commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits
adultery" (Matt. 19:9). 2) "But I say to you that whoever divorces
his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery;
and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery" (Matt.
5:32). These are the scriptures on the fornication exception that can
break the marriage bond.
Notice what
they don't mention:
o
An innocent party. It's not necessary
when fornication is the cause of the divorce, not the effect.
o
Courthouses or who gets there first, or the wording on legal
papers,.
o
A fornicator filing for divorce before his mate. It's not
necessary if his/her fornication occurs before divorce.
o
Divorces after divorces. If fornication is the cause, there
is no need to discuss another one.
o
The consequences of divorce. Wrong decisions bring
consequences, many of them unpleasant that last a lifetime. What would you tell
others about a younger or older person who had many opportunities for baptism
yet refused and died in his/her sin -- I feel sorry for them so we'll change
the rules?
o
Separation. I Corinthians 7 covers that situation.
Ř
God made
marriage a permanent relationship between a man and woman (Matt. 19:6). Man
sought a writing of divorcement, and Jesus made quite plain that such a step
does not please God (Matt. 19:4-5). Our society has made a mockery of marriage
and also of divorce acceptable to God. This attitude seems to have permeated
the church and the consequences are all of the controversial doctrines of
today.
When will the controversy end? When we just say what
the Bible says (fornication is the only cause for divorce) and leave all
the emotion, opinions, philosophy and love for family, out of it, and when we
realize that when we don't have reliable facts to make decisions, we must leave
the judgment to God.
Jack Glover
01/13/04
Comments or questions to jlglover@charter.net